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A woman has been slammed for wanting to lie to her best friend about why she can’t attend her destination wedding.

The 32-year-old said she is set to be a bridesmaid at her best friend Kayla’s overseas wedding in four months but has to fork out a minimum of $8,000 to go, using up all her savings. 

To get out of paying the ‘insane’ amount of money, she is considering lying to the bride by telling her she can’t attend because has to spend her savings on a major home repair when in reality she’s using the money to go on a holiday with her husband.

People agreed $8,000 was an ‘outlandish’ price to pay but called out the bridesmaid for her dishonesty. 

Kayla is throwing a seven-day affair for her wedding in a ‘tiny’ town in far-north Scandinavia where her fiance is from.

A bridesmaid said she wants to lie to her friend about not being able to afford to go to her destination wedding. She's instead using her money to go on a holiday with her husband

A bridesmaid said she wants to lie to her friend about not being able to afford to go to her destination wedding. She’s instead using her money to go on a holiday with her husband 

She had to push the date forward by a year due to family pressure giving guests just four months to plan the trip. 

‘Between flights, the hotel, the rental car, the bridesmaid dress, the full traditional outfit required to be worn for some the events, pet boarding, as well as general incidentals and we are looking at a minimum $8000,’ the woman said in a Reddit post. 

She added almost all the town’s accommodation has been booked up for Midsommar with spots left costing upwards of $300 a night and all of the groom’s family’s spare rooms have been claimed. 

The bridesmaid said Kayla was ‘very apologetic’ about changing the date but didn’t acknowledge the ‘huge impact’ it would have on her guests. 

For the last four years, she and her husband have been saving for a three-week tour of Japan to celebrate their tenth anniversary and she had booked flights for the trip just before Kayla announced the date change. 

‘Kayla didn’t know I had just booked flights and when she broke the news she actually said ‘You’re so lucky, you’ve been saving all that money for a vacation anyway!’,’ she said. 

The woman feels guilty for prioritising her anniversary trip over her wedding as Kayla forked out thousands for her nuptials years ago. 

‘My husband and I got married in Alaska right out of college when most of our friends, including Kayla, didn’t have particularly good or secure jobs,’ she said. 

‘We know now this wasn’t exactly fair of us but we split the rental of a big house with all our friends and flights to Alaska aren’t anywhere near the $2k each it would cost us to fly to Kayla’s wedding.’

She said she’s ‘scared’ to tell Kayla the real reason why she and her husband won’t be going to her wedding as she thinks it will ruin their friendship. 

‘I could see why it would. She was a bridesmaid for me while far less financially secure than we are now and she knows we have a lot of money saved for travel,’ she said. 

‘I fear she would question if our friendship is not worth cancelling our Japan plans and flights. Our friendship means a lot to me but I don’t think it’s fair to plan a wedding this expensive to attend and expect me to cancel our dream trip to accommodate it.’

The woman wants to lie to the bride saying she needs to use her savings on a 'major home repair' instead of the $8,000 wedding

The woman wants to lie to the bride saying she needs to use her savings on a ‘major home repair’ instead of the $8,000 wedding 

The bridesmaid she said wants to lie about having to do a ‘major home repair’ that will cost all of what she and her husband have saved plus some more to get out of going to the wedding. 

‘Then when it did come time for the Asia trip say we were gifted the trip by my husband’s parents,’ she said. 

‘I know that there is a risk she would find out the truth and be even angrier, is that risk worth it to avoid telling her the truth?’ 

Users were torn by the bridesmaid’s dilemma saying while $8,000 was an ‘unreasonable’ amount to pay, she shouldn’t be dishonest with Kayla. 

‘$8K is an outlandish amount to ask anyone to pay to come to a wedding. Ever. Full stop. The answer is, ‘We just can’t afford that. We booked our Japan vacation already, not knowing that you were going to change the date, and we can’t do this’,’ one said.

‘Your actual reason is sufficient. Making something up would just make it dodgy. Tell her the truth.’

‘You’re not an a**hole for not wanting to spend $8K to go to a wedding. But you are the a**hole for trying to come up with a complicated lie. Just be honest and talk to your friend,’ a second agreed. 

‘Grow up and bite the bullet,’ someone added.  

Others blasted the bride for expecting her guests to splash so much cash on her wedding dubbing her ‘self-centred’.

‘Either way, f*** that wedding. She’s a s****y friend for expecting someone to use their dream vacation anniversary money for a wedding,’ one person wrote. 



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