A woman has told fellow social-media users that she has had to endure an ongoing saga with her in-laws over who should be invited to their wedding. She said that, with the wedding a year out, they asked for a list of possible people to invite, but the groom’s father and step-mother said they felt they were being left out and asked the grandmother to intervene.

She said that she found out that her father-in-law and his wife had claimed they felt unimportant in the organisation of the wedding so the grandmother then decided to “attack” the bride-to-be and her groom Shane about the issue. The couple then asked for a list of guests they wanted from them but it took them a week to get it over to the couple.

The woman said that she was told the couple had forgotten the list at work, hence the delay, but the saga had stretched out to two weeks and it became such an issue that the grandmother began to only converse with the groom. The woman said: “She has continually came after me and has messaged Shane saying I’m only sending this to you like he wasn’t gonna tell me. And this is a nugget from yesterday am I justified in what I told her and justified in the fact I think she’s a c***? Also I would like to point out Shane has told me and proven that he is on my side and will choose me over her.”

Many of the commenters on her post to Reddit said they were fully behind her as it was her wedding and she should have full control of it. One said: “You cannot have a huge wedding list of ‘they won’t come anyway, but we will invite them’. You are right! You never know who may decide to make it work. Hold strong. You want people there that you know & love.”

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Another said: “We encountered similar things during our wedding planning process with in-laws. The difference is my husband handled all the communications with his family. If my mother-in-law or grand mother-in-law talked to me like this, we wouldn’t be able to come back from this and have a good relationship after. Hubby needs to manage his side of the family. Good luck and don’t stress yourself out about pleasing them… they’ll never be happy with anything you do.

A third advised: “Take the bull by the horns and tell her you don’t need or want her list. You will be inviting whomever you’d like to invite, and that’s IT. If she doesn’t like it, she doesn’t have to go. Quit explaining yourself. You don’t owe anyone any explanations on why you want YOUR wedding a certain way. They don’t have to like it, it’s not THEIR wedding. Please don’t sacrifice what you and your fiancé want for anyone. It is not worth the resentment that will fester as a result.”